Do
you find it curious that whenever a
group of White Nationalists, Anti-Semites, Klansmen, MAGA cap-wearing, AR-15
toting assholes get together for a Nuremberg Rally for him, Trump always
manages, without fail and reflexively, to find many in the crowd to be “reasonable
and responsible”?
FADE
IN.
INT.
– White House Press Room – DAY
Trump
finishes up his daily pathological, non-stop, kaleidoscopic upchucking of lies,
deflections, projections, finger-pointing, whining, and name-calling to take a
question from a very patient reporter.
Reporter:
“Mr. President, a lynch mob, in a redneck Red State that worships you as the
Second Coming, dragged a black man out of a county jail and up to a hastily, shabbily
thrown together gallows for hanging. He had been picked up for unpaid parking tickets
and was scheduled to appear in Traffic Court.”
Trump:
“As you have reported in your fake newspapers, more people are killed in auto
accidents, in the USA, than by this overblown Chinavirus hoax. This guy sounds like
a dangerous hombre. He should not be driving around with a bunch of unpaid
parking tickets. Your reporting, on this so-called “lynching”, was too harsh. To
me, it looked more like a beautiful, fraternity hazing prank.”
Reporter:
“Sir, he was dragged out of a county jail by a mob of…”
Trump
(abruptly interrupting): “Enough! You are a disgrace. I did not see the lynch
mob drag him out. He was reasonably and responsibly escorted to
the gallows. By the way, you reporters, once again, failed to give us any
credit. That rope was made with Trump Hemp and the gallows was constructed by
Jared Kushner’s construction company.”
Reporter:
“The gallows collapsed when the trap door was released and fell on the ground into
thousands of splintered pieces. The rope snapped and broke, causing the black man
to slam to the ground, suffering severe, multiple ankle sprains.”
Trump:
“well, there you are. One less tap-dancing Mr. Bojangles wannabe we have taken
off the welfare rolls. No harm, no foul. Next question.”
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